I'll Choose a Stepfather Any Day; A Stepfather Shaped the Man I Am Today – Konnected Minds Founder
In Ghanaian society, discussions about step-parents often veer toward narratives of hardship, favouritism, and emotional trauma. The cultural discourse has long been dominated by cautionary tales of blended families where step-fathers are portrayed as distant figures or, worse, as sources of conflict and neglect. This perception has become so ingrained that the mere mention of a “stepfather” can evoke assumptions of favouritism toward biological children or emotional detachment.
Derrick Abaitey’s story offers a necessary counterpoint — one that challenges stereotypes and highlights the profound positive impact a step-parent can have. The entrepreneur and host of Konnected Minds recalls his upbringing not with resentment but with deep gratitude, crediting his stepfather as one of the greatest influences in his life and a direct architect of the values that guide him today.
Born in Akyem Soabe, a small community in the Eastern Region, Abaitey’s early years were shaped by a household headed by his mother, grandmother, and stepfather. His biological father, though reportedly wealthy, lived abroad for much of Abaitey’s childhood, making him more of a concept than a presence. “I heard people say my father had money,” Abaitey recounts, “but I didn’t know him. I hadn’t even spoken to him for more than five minutes at the time, so I didn’t know whether he had money or not.”
In contrast, his stepfather was a constant and active presence. Far from the disengaged stereotype, this man embodied entrepreneurial spirit in its purest form. He worked the land — cultivating sugarcane, harvesting palm nuts, trading cocoyam — and later channeled his industriousness into opening the first agrochemical shop in Akyem Soabe. There was no waiting opportunity; he was created.
“He never worked for anybody,” Abaitey emphasizes, a note of pride in his voice. “He was into farming, sugarcane, palm nuts, cocoyam, you name it. Later, he also opened the first agrochemical shop in Akyem Soabe. He was a real hustler.”
This relentless drive did more than sustain the family financially. It provided a living lesson in self-determination. For a young boy watching his stepfather turn ideas into action, the message was clear: waiting for opportunity was not a viable strategy. Instead, one had to create it — a mindset that would later become the cornerstone of Abaitey’s own entrepreneurial pursuits with Konnected Minds, much like the journey documented in [from skype message to side hustle how a ghanaian student built a clothing business in london](/from-skype-message-to-side-hustle-how-a-ghanaian-student-built-a-clothing-business-in-london) where another young Ghanaian transformed limited resources into a viable business through determination and creativity.
Beyond the tangible example of industry, the stepfather offered something equally foundational: emotional stability. Abaitey reflects that growing up in a household where his mother’s marriage was secure fostered a deep-seated sense of security. “I think when children see their mothers in a stable marriage, it gives them security,” he observes. “That’s what I felt growing up.” This psychological bedrock allowed him to explore, learn, and take risks without the constant undercurrent of instability that can hinder development in less secure environments.
Life’s journey eventually led Abaitey elsewhere. After reconnecting with his biological father, he moved to London in anticipation of his Basic Education Certificate Examination results. The transition was significant — trading the familiar rhythms of Akyem Soabe for the pace of an international city. Yet, even as he adapted to new surroundings, the lessons from his formative years remained intact. The values instilled by his stepfather — diligence, integrity, and the courage to initiate rather than wait — continued to serve as his compass.
“I hold the values I have purely because of some of the things my stepfather taught me about being a man,” Abaitey states with unwavering conviction, a sentiment he repeated during an appearance on _The Career Trail_ Season 4 on Joy Learning TV and Joy News. “He’s also partly the reason why I became an entrepreneur because I watched how he created opportunities for himself.” When pressed about whether he would make the same choice given his experiences today, his response was immediate and unequivocal: “I’ll choose a stepfather any day.”
In a society quick to judge non-traditional family structures through a lens of suspicion, Abaitey’s experience serves as a vital reminder are reserved not for biological connections alone, but for the everyday acts of care, consistency, and commitment that truly shape a child’s trajectory — regardless of how a family comes to be.
Image Source: MYJOYONLINE
